Leadership is everything to a Lazy Trainer

“A little learning is a dangerous thing.” Ignorance is too, so one might as well make it a point to learn.

When trying to teach others how to train their animals the most difficult thing to teach is just how much effort is really needed to accomplish a goal. The correct answer is just as much as it takes and no more.

Too much effort is just as bad as too little effort when teaching an animal something. This is also true when we are training people.

Just how far is it necessary to go in order to train a horse or dog? The following story will demonstrate the far end of the “As much as it takes” scale.

I had been training horses and people for twenty-five years, but had gaps where my methods fell far short of my goals. I was an accomplished trainer and many would say the places I failed were just because the animals weren’t suited for the task. Deep in my heart I knew the real fault lay within me not the horse or dog. But I didn’t know how to correct the problems.

A friend gave me a ticket to a Parelli clinic and it was as if a whole new universe had opened up to me. Through the application of the Seven Games I began to mend the holes in my methods. For a year or so everything went great. I was frustrated in the beginning because I was using too much effort to get my horses to do what I wanted but I began to see how to damp down my body language so it became easier and easier to do whatever it was I wanted to do.

I began to think I’d really gotten the hang of things when a friend mentioned some problems she was having with her mare. The mare is one that we had trained together and she was endlessly patient with my friend’s grandchildren, but she only had one speed sloooow. Since she was an Arabian this was quite puzzlement to anyone who dealt with her.

I went to my friend’s stable and we started using the Seven Games with the mare. Things were going along pretty well. I forgot one important thing a trainer had told me many, many years before; “The most dangerous horse you’ll ever tackle is the old packer horse that is convinced it is in charge. That horse will not give up its alpha position without a fight.”

Six weeks into the Arabian mare’s rehab I found out just how dangerous that reliable packer horse could be.
The session started out well enough. We played the Friendly Game, the Porcupine Game, the Driving Game, the Yo-yo Game (though she drug furrows in the dirt when I asked her to back up) and were on to the Circle Game. There is where it all went to heck-in-a-handbasket. I halted her, and before sending her in the opposite direction, asked her to back up. It was both the biggest mistake I ever made and the smartest thing I ever did.

At that first Parelli clinic the instructor spent the first session teaching the people, without their horses, how to use their equipment. One of the exercises was rope twirling. Now this sounds silly. What does twirling the end of a lead rope have to do with training a horse? Turns out—a LOT. I took her seriously and practiced the twirling until I could do it with both right and left hand. I could also touch any target I aimed at with the little leather bit on the end of the lead rope. A far more valuable skill than I realized at the time.

When I asked my friend’s mare to back she decided she’d had enough of this human challenging her authority. Now, unlike a dog, a horse is not out to kill. Even the worst horse is actually acting from fear or the need to maintain herd position. The only problem is a horse can dish out and take a lot of punishment. A kick that will make another horse back off a step or two can kill a human. A bite that will merely correct a disobedient herd member can remove a human arm. So, though the intent isn’t to kill it can still be deadly.

The mare slicked back her ears and came straight down the rope, mouth agape, headed for me. I don’t mind saying that was one of the most frightening sights I’ve ever seen in my career. I twirled the rope and caught her on the end of the nose with that little leather bit. It stopped her first charge. It did not stop her attempt to subdue me. We spent the next twenty minutes with her making every attempt to put me in my place as a beta to her alpha.

Finally, both of us dripping with sweat, she stood and dropped her head. I asked her to back and she did. Then she made a ‘lick and chew’ motion with her lips. This is a sure sign a horse has accepted new knowledge; which in this case was that I was her leader.

I walked up to her and rubbed her neck, not realizing at that time that I was reaffirming my alpha status. Grooming is very important because only a higher ranked horse can initiate a grooming session.

In most cases establishing myself as leader requires no more than walking up to a horse with a confident manner (and make no mistake, after that session with the Arabian mare, my confidence is real) moving it out of its place, occupying territory and then rubbing its neck.

But the most important thing, the reason people like Pat Parelli and Cesar Millan are so successful with animals, is that once in the presence of an animal it is necessary to do whatever it takes to gain the leadership position. This is not accomplished by being cruel. It is done by doing only what needs to be done. Like Doc in the previous post it may only be necessary to crowd the horse or dog until they move and yield space. Or it may be necessary to stay in the fight until the animal yields.

If you are going to deal with difficult animals you MUST accept that you will get bitten, kicked, pawed, clawed and body slammed. But you have to hang in there until you’ve convinced the animal to accept you as the leader.

Most animals and most people are looking for a leader they can trust. If you are that leader your cat, dog, horse or other humans will follow you and do your bidding willingly. The reason there is sometimes a fight is because the subject, be it animal or human, has learned that others are not trustworthy.

Lazy Trainer Tips


Confidence is everything. When you buy or otherwise acquire a horse or dog choose one that you are confident you can handle. If you are a couch potato don’t go out and buy a young Arabian or Thoroughbred. In fact, don’t buy a young horse of any kind. If it is a dog you are acquiring, again think about getting an older animal. A dog that is three or older is a wonderful animal to have. Depending on breed you can have it for a long time. I currently have a twenty-one year old rat terrier. She’s getting a bit creaky, but she is still pretty spry.

Practice with your equipment, leash, lead rope, whatever, before you try to use it with an animal. Like the ‘rope-twirling’ the ability to react without conscious effort may even be life-saving for you or your animal.

Before getting any animal learn what that animal needs in a leader. And then commit yourself to being that leader. You owe it to any animal you bring into your world to do the best you can by it. That means being a good, trustworthy leader as well as meeting its needs for food, shelter and other necessities.

Your reward for practicing good leadership skills with your horse, cat or dog will be an unconditional love and friendship. This is something a lot of us need in our busy, stress filled lives.